I don’t want on and off. I want always and forever.

"Sometimes, it’s just too difficult to care, because if you care more than you know you should, it hurts worse when you’re let down. Sometimes it’s just easier to not give a damn. Then when something does work out, it’s a nice surprise and nothing has been ruined. And that’s when we smile the most. "

-

Wednesday, i failed my FTT. Damn. Well, expected it because i only started studying for it 1 day before the test? :(

Nothing much going on this few days..

Just trainings, trainings & trainings! Just for 5 months, endure!

& i am required to lose weight.

Zzzz.

How to? I love foood so much :(

Tomorrow will be good.

"It’s not that that I can handle all this pain, it’s that I have to."

The truth is; everyone gets to the point of a breakdown, only some people hide it better.

I've got no school tomorrow! Yay yay yay! Okay, actually i am NOT going to school tomorrow!

Because.... I've to take my Final theory test. I can see that i am for sure gonna flunk that test because i have not even study for it. Only read the first few pages. Probably gonna read the next few pages before i head to bed, hopefully..

Sunday morning, headed to my cousin's wedding. Love the foood! But i didn't eat much cause i was saving my stomach for later. Evening, had a pre-celebration for our 1st year. Had international buffet at United Square. I couldn't stop salivating at the desserts heh. Omgz, i'm hungry now. After dinner, did some shopping. & yes, finally did not went home empty handed. But i went home with a hole in my pocket.

Next week is UT week! Zzzzz.

365 days.

"All the pain and the fear and the crap.
Maybe going through all of that is what keeps us moving forward.
It’s what pushes us.
Maybe we have to get a little messed up, before we can step up."

Happy 1 Year, N.
Love you, always

Happy 18th Birthday Christine & 21st Coach Karenn!

Yep, both birthdays fall on the same day! Happy Birthday to both of ya!(:

-

Damn. My cough is still here. Have not recover yet. Still coughing like no tomorrow.. Went to see a doctor yesterday. The doctor said i can't eat grapes, oranges & watermelon. & no honey lemon. Omgzzz. That explains why i am still having my cough because i've been drinking honey lemon almost everyday.. Oh & also, no cold drink :( I'm still waiting for my cough to go away so i'd be able to drink the yummy Honey Snow Blend introduced by Elaine marie. Now most of the Rexaz people drink it too..

Thursday was Coach.k's 21st birthday party over at The Cheverons(sp?). Woohoo, loads and loads of foood! Extremely love the cheeeeesy hotdogs! & I've to blog about coach.k's sushi cake! The minute i saw it, i was counting down to the cake cutting session. heh! Cause i can't wait to get my hands on that cake! First time in my life i ate a sushi cake(: But the consquences of eating the cake was me coughing.. Ok la, not only because of the cake. I drank cold drink too. lol. I really cough like hell that my lungs almost came out. Went home at about 10 plus? Now i understand how the west side people feel when chalets are located at the east side. Because when they go home, it's a long journey for them. For that day, it was my turn!

My two monkeys.

My happy treee friends!

Sam just came out to my place just now! She came over to see Snowball. Haha. We should go out soon. I know i'm always busy. But she's also always busy! When i free, she's not free. When she's free, i'm not. Blooody hellll..

Gotta sleep early tonight. Tomorrow's my cousin's wedding. Have to be there by 10am. Zzz.

Gooodnight!

Yay, 1more day to 1 year!

I am just whining..

I am so freaking tired :( :( :( I hate wednesday lesson. How long more is this gonna go.. 12 more weeks! 12 more weeeks! Omgggg i can just fall asleep anywhere. 5 days straight of school is really crazy. I neeed sleeeep :( My body is aching due to V-ups. My throat is sore due to coughing. & when everything adds up together, it just sucks! Today's not a good day :(

She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before.

Omgggggg i've been coughing since last week? & today, i coughed till the side of my tummy hurts! :( Supposed to visit the doctor but by the time i got to the clinic, there was a lot of people so i decided to give it miss & just be reliant on my PI PA KAO! I really like it! It is the only medicine that taste sweeet(: Each time i eat it, i wish i could have a few more spoons of it but i know i'd get an overdose or something.. Looking forward to eat it tomorrow! But, i'm not looking forward to something tomorrow. WEDNESDAY LESSON :(((((

Today, my class mate, let out the biggest & smelliest fart ever! It seriously stink to the core until i almost puked & according to my classmates, my whole face turned red. But it was a funny experience.. But i'd never want to experience it ever again! I could just faint on the spot.!

Sunday, went orchard with Nigel. Bloody hell that bastard lied to me. He told me he was on the bus already. (i was quite shocked actually. bcos he is never early!) & i thought he would reach earlier than me. But when i got there, i recieved a message from him.. "eh sorry uh, i'd be late. The bus like long uh." But i knew he was lying cause he is supposed to reach earlier than me since his bus is faster. After some time, he finally decided to tell me the truth. " Eh, actually my dad drive me there la.. Haha." (*&^%#$^*#&^&*@^# He can still tell me that the bus like long uh. Zzzzz. Had lunch at Crystal Jade. Then walked to ION. It was my 2nd time there.. Still not familiar with the mall yet. Didnt buy anything home :( sigh.. Okay sorry for broken english. I'm very tired. Gonna sleep now bye!

Once a failure, not always a failure.

I'm a failure in my studies, in my relationship & in cheerleading..

I will never be a failure in those 3 anymore.

I've woken up.

I've learn a lot tonight..

& You'll see a change coming..

Sick Sick Sick..

I'm seriously gonna die from coughing.. I've been coughing since the start of the day. It only got worst towards the end of the day. Even when i slept on the bus, i'd wake up a few times just to cough. I felt so embarrassed because i'm afraid that people around me would get irritated with my coughing.

The first Nationals training was supposed to start today but it was cancelled because quite a number of people couldn't make it. Ended up gymming for a short while before heading home to rest.

Something that i'd like to share.. I absolutely love the porridge my maid cooks. You know yesterday, i was feeeling very feverish and weak. So i requested for her to cook me a bowl of snowball porridge. Ha! Yes, the porridge she cooked is called Snowball Porridge. You guys must be wondering why.. Now, let me tell you why isn't called Snowball Porridge. That's because when Snowball runs out of dog food, my maid would cook porridge for him to eat. One night.. i went to the kitchen to sneak for food & i saw a pot of porridge which was snowball's breakfat. I decided to scoop out a spoon of porridge to see how does it taste like. It taste really good! Even though it was quite blend but i like it. Snowball likes it too.. The porridge has slices of carrots and chunks of meat in it. It taste really fab! After eating the porridge yesterday, i immediately felt better!

I asked my maid to cook it for me today again.. without carrots because we ran out of it. But it still taste good(:

Anyway, i lost 2kg! Yayyy. Haven't been eating much this few days. Didn't have much appetite. Probably because i am feeling unwell..

Sigh.. My grades are so so for this 2 weeks. I felt that i've contributed much more than i did in Sem1 but my grades still seems to be not what i expected :( Gotta keep working hard!
Alright, off to watch some Youtube video before i hit the sack. Definitely need plenty of rest now.
Byee!

C-H-E-E-R-L-E-A-D-I-N-G N-A-T-I-O-N-A-L-S 2010!

Can you believe it? I got into nationals! Yayy!

I'm really happy & excited for the next coming 5 months & the day of the competition! But of course, i'm also afraid. I'm afraid that the process will be too tough for me to take it & that i'd give up. I hope not.. Because i really want to do something that i've never done before! I've never expected myself to be in nationals because i know i wasn't good enough. Since i'm chosen for it, i will try my very best to put my 100% in it! Not gonna let
coach.k & the team down. So throughout the next 5 months, there will definitely be tears & sweat, but there will also be laughter & joy! Let's all work hard & grow together!

I'm having a slight fever together with a sore throat. My throat is killing me even after drinking one bottle of honey lemon. :( I hope to get well sooon!

Anyway.. Watch this video! It's about Timid Bear (:

Someone said i was the timid bear. Heh, i think i am too. But no! Look towards the end of the video.. It became fierce after one month of training.

Alright, some overdue pictures taken ytd with Alan, Mel, Elaine & Ling yin!!

omgz i cannot tahan my throat.

zzz

Troubles troubles, go awayyyyyy.

Sigh.. wednesday used to be my off days. Now, it's no longer an off day for me :( Got into a new class. Weird at first, better towards the end? The facilitator is very nice. Unlike my previous faci.. Finally lesson is over! However, there is still 13 problems more to goooo :( Hope that every week just gets better!

Anyhow, celebrated Sheena's 19th belated birthday yesterday at Kbox. Met after school & we headed to her house first because that lazy girl want to put down her heavy laptop. While i was waiting for her to get ready, i saw a ugly looking doll on the bed. I took the doll up & said " wah lau, whose doll is this.. So ugly.." Then she was like " WHAT UGLY! So pretty lor.. My doll la.."

Lol. Actually when u take a closer look at the doll, its quite cute actually. But the face of the doll is pretty scaryyyy.

Took 960 down to Marina Square to meet Kehui. Went to Kbox for some karaoke session! We ordered the buffet thingy too. First thing when we went into the room, we quickily rush to the buffet section because we were damn damn hungry! At that moment we were just like pigs..

Sang all the way till 11pm.. Not forgetting singing of birthday song to the birthday girl. Love outings like that!

Thank god tmr's lesson is at 915am. I'm still not use to coming school at 830am.

Alright, gotta go meet my programme chair now! Tooodles!

What i've learn is, the lesser you expect, the lesser you'll get hurt.